Talk:Cohort-The Sho'Tak Raid

If I could make one suggestion it is that I feel your narritve would improve and feel less breakneck to read if you drew out some scenes with imagry. Everything reads like its happening within seconds of one another and it's hard to keep up with it in some cases. Slowing it down with some fluffy imagry and such could go a long way to making it a bit more comfortable to read. Now also the characterization of the Tau seems spot on to me, but again, especially with Var'ei and her commanding officer a bit of a description or imagry would really help out. I had trouble really visualizing their scenes and what was going on. That might just be me though. Other than that I have to say that no one captures the Mechanicus like you do Plauge its a damn beautiful thing to read. I would like to ask if their adepts are really capable of insubordination like Adept Haggith, as I never pictured an Admech smiling or disobeying direct orders due to bloodlust. All thought provoking stuff.T42 (talk) 10:58, December 20, 2014 (UTC)